Human Relations

In my human relations class last week, our (quirky) professor gave us an assignment.  I'll start at the beginning.  My professor has us call her Kathy.  Last week she told us her daughter who lives in Colorado had a change of plans for Thanksgiving.  Originally, she wouldn't be able to come home but now she is.  So she told us over Thanksgiving break we should spend one hour alone with our mother and have her write Kathy a note.  She is known to give extra credit willy nilly and this was one of those moments.  Since I live at home still and commute to campus everyday, I asked, "What if you still live with your mother?"  Kathy asked me if I spent time with her....I had to call my  mom right after class.  This is the note she wrote that night.
 

“A daughter is a little girl who grows up to be your friend.”

      This week an assignment was given….spend an hour with your mom over Thanksgiving break. Oh my, only an hour? My daughter, Angie, and I spend many hours together. We are blessed.
      Would I share her with you? You betcha. Her joy is infectious and her quirky ways will make you laugh. However, I will warn you, your heart will be wrenched in two when her diseases flare and the pain takes her smile away.
When “my bug” was little I tried to teach her that life wasn’t fair. A lesson I learned when my brother was killed. BUT darn it all, life is REALLY not fair to Angie. Her story is long….you should hear it ALL sometime….she really is an amazing person. I’m so proud to be her mom.       Angie is a treasure. Her illnesses are difficult. We don’t know what tomorrow might hold and SO we make the most of today. We spend hours talking….about little things and big things. She has an awesome attitude. She is a wonderful friend.
Michelle


When I gave the note to my professor, she had tears in her eyes.  Of course, I agreed when she asked if she could anonymously share it with the class.  I told her I had no problem with her sharing my name.  She read it to the class and let them decide how much extra credit I should get.  They maxed me out extra credit.  My relationship with my mom is the perfect example of human relations.

Priorities

So, Angelala is still flaring some rockin' Lupus but attempting to push through and not fall behind in school.  This Tuesday was a lecture that I desperately wanted to go to on campus.  The speaker was was Paul Rusesabagina.  Mr. Rusesabagina was the man whom the movie Hotel Rwanda was based on.  What a wonderfully touching movie!  In my Human Relations class, we were lucky enough to hear from a Rwandan refugee who is attending our university.  Luckily, she and her entire family survived.  She had been separated from them and walked bare foot for three mouths to get out of Rwanda, relatively unharmed although tramatized.  But I digress...

Mr Rusesabagina spoke on campus Tuesday evening after a showing of Hotel Rwanda.  I really, really wanted to hear him speak but life happens right....

Tuesday at 2:54pm my uncle Ron had a baby girl with his partner Autumn.  I can't tell you enough wonderful things about this man who has always been there as a solid part of our family.  Autumn is a kind, compassionate, loving woman who has become a huge part of our family.  She became a wonderful friend to me over many lunches full of Culver's fries and ranch dressing.  My beautiful cousin Carli was born by c-section on Tuesday afternoon.  Of course, I simply had to see her as soon as I could and let Ron and Autumn know how excited I was for them and the rest of our family. 

So I left campus early, ran home quick, and met my mom at my sister's house to drive up together.  All in all I spent four hours driving (not including the time I spent in the car not driving).  I didn't get home until after ten and was exhausted.  Wednesday was a bad pain day and I stayed home from school...pushed myself too hard the day before.  But it was totally worth it because I got to meet that beautiful little girl.

Let me introduce... Carli Rayann

Angela and baby Carli

Photo by Angelala

So although I didn't get to hear Mr. Rusesabagina speak and was too tired to go to school the next day, I got to hold Miss Carli when she was only a few hours old.  It's all about priorities and I am so glad I made that decision.

Long Distance Baking

Anyone with Lupus or any other chronic illness knows there are times when you are going to be in pain and there ain't much you can do to stop it.  One of my tips is chocolate...and lots of it.  And loving Mr. O is an expert on this fact.  He has been known to send me personalized m&ms that told me "I love you" "Happy Anniversary" etc.  Sometimes he would do this for no reason.  Today I got home to a package from Mr. O that contained homemade brownies with cream cheese frosting that he mixed raspberries into.  Granted they aren't the prettiest things but oh my goodness....they are delicious!!!

Photo by Angelala

Now Mr. O is a thousand miles away so he Fedexed by little present.  Miss Tess my 14 year old cat decided maybe she wanted to go see Mr. O.  Such a silly girl

Gratitude List

So I mentioned Crazy Sexy Cancer the other day.  Well the creator of it made a website called Crazy Sexy Life that includes a blog.  Today's blog was was "Tips for a Better Life".  I loved all 20 tips but #3 really stuck with me.

3. Try to make a gratitude list each day. Include big things and little things. Invite your friends to make their own lists; you can all email one another each day, sharing your gratitude.

So here is my gratitude list for today.

1.My cat, Tess, who is always ready to cuddle with me.  She snores but I'm ok with that.
2.The color pink.  My bedroom is decorated in pink, kelly green, and brown.  Pink soothes me a lot.
3.Homework helps me take my mind off the pain.
4.Chocolate...who isn't grateful for chocolate?
5.The internet because it helps me connect with people.
6.Essential oils (Young Living): Panaway is like crack to me.
7.My mom cause she still lets me sit on her lap and rock.
8.Oxygen, weird I know.  Every time I take a deep breath I'm grateful.
9.Mr. O because he is so loving and thoughtful.
10.The love everyone has shown me because I wouldn't be the person I am today if it weren't for all the people who have loved me.

Mr. O and Angelala

Living with Lupus...in College/School

I decided to start a series of posts entitled "Living with Lupus..." and specifically focus on one aspect of life.  Since I'm currently in a flare and school is my biggest concern...that is the focus of the first post.

I was diagnosed with APS when I was 16 and over five years later, my illnesses still aren't under control.  So how have I managed to finish high school (missing around thirty days my senior year) and do well in college for the last three plus years?  I've had a lot of help.

Gotta give mad props to the Americans with Disabilities Act for applying to education as well as employment.  How does it apply?  Basically teachers/instructors/professors are legally obligated to make accommodations for people with disabilities.  Of course, these disabilities have to documented by the educational institution.  Instructors must be informed of these accommodations...not going to lie this is usually awkward.  The school that I currently attend has a Disability Office which I visit once a semester to meet with one of their advisors.  We go over my class list, talk about the previous semester's accommodations, and what we might need to change.  My accommodations haven't changed for the last three semesters which is nice.  The awkward part comes when I have to approach my professors, tell them I have an illness and work with the DO, and nicely inform them I might miss multiple classes.  My accommodations include extended absenses, extended time for tests/assignments, and a copy of the notes if I am gone.  Not that bad right?   still no one likes to hear that but I haven't run into any problems at school so far.

High school was different, mainly just because of the paperwork.  We had an amazing school nurse who is one of the most caring women I've ever met.  I basically had to fill out a 504 plan which just informs teachers what to do if I was gone for a significant period of time.  It was hard at points but I got everything done.

My mom...bless her heart times about a million.  I have been lucky enough to live at home all through college.  I couldn't live in the dorms...things are too inconsistent.  Lupus is all about balance...I'm walking on a tight rope every day.  I worry about school and that's it.  I don't have to deal with food or anything like that.  I'm not completely dependent!  I clean, do my own laundry, blah blah blah.  But the idea of cooking dinner every night plus homework etc seems too daunting.  I would probably just skip dinner (and weigh less). 

Now, another thing that has helped me in school is Vocational Rehabilitation.  I did not even know about this program until the nurse I mentioned earlier (the wonderful one...remember?) told my mom about it.  Voc. Rehab has essentially paid for half my tuition.  In the last three years, it has made it possible for me to not have a job.  Me + job = disaster!  I simply can't juggle a job and school and do well at both.  Believe me, I've tried....Voc Rehab is a life line for me!!!

And the last thing that has helped me survive college with chronic illnesses is myself.  I work hard.  I work through pain and frustrations.  I work ahead of peers in case a flare does spring up.  (Thanks to my illness) I don't go out...I stay home and do school work.  So see not everything about illness is bad!  Cheer up buttercup!

If anyone has any questions about different programs or specific tips for college life with chronic illness, let me know and I will try to help!

Lupie Days

Today (and yesterday) have been bad Lupus days.  I ended up staying home from school yesterday and came home early today.  Thankfully, I have understanding professors (one has fibromyalgia).  It always takes me forever to decide if staying home will bite me in the ass later.  I'm hoping that this isn't the start of a flare.

On the Daily Show last night, there was an author who Bright-Sided who basically said that having a positive attitude doesn't help.  She was diagnosed with breast cancer and was disgusted by people who, in the words of Dr. Cox from Scrubs, "vomits sunshine".  I have been living with illness for almost six years which is getting dangerously close to a third of my life.  The only way I have gotten through all of it is my positive attitude.  That's not to say I haven't had bad moments where I've had pity parties for myself.  I just don't think that it's going to help by feeling miserable and depressed all the time.

Also on last night, I watched the documentary Crazy Sexy Cancer about a young woman documenting her battle with cancer.  It seems like I watch a lot of tv...doesn't it?  She used a lot of different alternative medicine like macrobiotics.  She said, "I just want to have a normal life."  Oh, honey if it were only that simple.

Gay (LGBT) History Month

     October is Gay History Month or LGBT (Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgendered) History Month.  I am so lucky to have LOGO in my satellite package.I wouldn't even know about it with that blessed channel. 
     In case you've been too afraid to watch the "Gay Network", you've missed a lot!  You all know I'm from a small town where sexuality in general is not discussed.  It is easy to be prejudiced because you aren't exposed to other things.  Watching love stories about two men, like Adam and Steve, or two women, like Imagine You and Me, have made me more comfortable with actually seeing LGBT relationships in front of me.  At the same time, it makes me so proud that the Iowa Supreme Court legalized gay marriage...way to go Iowa!!! 
     Yesterday on LOGO there was an awesome documentary called A Jihad for Love.  It was about the struggle that gay and lesbian Muslims have faced balancing their religion and sexuality.  But it went beyond the religion and into the governments of places like Iran where homosexual sex is illegal.  The punishment for one of the men caught included 100 lashes....truly sickening.  A lot of the men and women had moved to more inclusion countries like Turkey and Canada.  
     So, I tagged this post as education for two reasons: 1) because all people should be educated on the struggles faced by LGBT people and 2) because educators have to be really sensitive in these areas.  All students (in high school) are discovering their sexuality, no matter the preference.  But no teacher wants to bring this issue up.  I found a wonderful article called "Raising Gay/Lesbian Issues in the Classroom" that give examples of issues and potential ways for teachers to deal with them.  They are generic but still helpful. 
     In this month that we are celebrating the fight for civil rights among the gay and lesbian community, we should remember that the struggle was started because of love and that's how it should end.  With all people accepting that love really is all we need.

Beauty au natural

     If you look at any typical college campus, you will most likely see girls wearing sweat pants, uggs, and too much make-up (or in some cases none at all).  I have never been a typical college girl and in the last year I have gotten even more different.
     I am not a big make-up chick but I usually wear foundation.  Recently, I decided I wanted to switch to organic make-up because of all the things they put in make-up.  Unfortunately, I'm still a poor college student who doesn't want to spend $45 on foundation.  Luckily, I found Physicians Formula organic make-up at target for about $13.  I also use their powder sometimes as well.
     Baking soda is your friend!  I use a baking soda/water paste for pimples.  Baking soda also makes your skin silky smooth.  In the last few months, I stopped shampooing and conditioning my hair (in the traditional sense).  Here is my nightly ritual: I take a small container (reused from my mom's tupperware drawer) put a tablespoon of baking soda in.  Mix in two tablespoons of water and stir.  This is a paste and should be sort of thick.  Then I take my apple cider vinegar, one tablespoon, and put it in a squirt bottle.  I mix in around four tablespoons of water and shake, shake, shake.  Once I'm in the shower, I just massage the baking soda mixture into my scalp.  I typically leave it in for a little while then rinse well!  Then I just squirt the apple cider vinegar into my hair and run my fingers through.  FYI, if you don't throughly rinse out all the baking soda, you will have a volcano effect on your head.  The reaction to the vinegar will cause bubbling.  This won't hurt you...I've done it a few times.
     I am trying to eliminate all harsh/unnecessary chemicals from my (simple) beauty regiment.  Need some different ideas?  I also find Planet Green: Fashion & Beauty so helpful.  Try some natural beauty treatments.  My next project is a sugar exfoliator.  Does anyone have some natural beauty treatments they'd like to share?  I would love to hear them!!

Lucky Lupus Liver

     When I was pregnant, I was unbelievably sick.  I really can't even describe how awful I felt.  I suffered from chronic headaches and eventually started twitching.  My head and neck would move uncontrollably.  I was told by one doctor it was nerves and hormones.  My mom, bless her heart, did so much research.  That summer she figured out that I had Antiphospholipid Antibody Syndrome (APS).
     The morning my son was born I went into the hospital with vomiting, high blood pressure and massive swelling.  It turns out my kidneys and liver were shutting down and Little Man's heart rate was dropping.  I had really, really bad Preeclampsia.  I ended up having an emergency c-section two months before my due date.  My son was 3 pounds 11 ounces when he was born...the reason why I call him Little Man.  It took over a week in the hospital and I was finally well enough to go home.  A hematologist diagnosed me with APS and prescribed me blood thinners.  I just celebrated my five year anniversary with my blood thinners this summer.
     A few years later, I saw a rheumatologist and he diagnosed me with Lupus.  Most likely, my APS is just part of my Lupus.  This is a super fast version of my diagnosis!
    Living with Lupus is a lot harder than being diagnosed.  I have arthritis in both hands, my right knee, and left foot.  I have extreme fatigue.  I have flares about every three-four months.  My flares usually put me in bed.  There is no way of knowing when a flare will jump up or how long it will last. 
    Not everything is bad though.  I have a built in excuse to not do stuff.  I have a better appreciation for good days.  Oh and I was on the show Mystery Diagnosis when I was 18.

Love (can) = Life

     My love story starts with two stupid teenagers...like a lot of love stories.  Mr. O and I met when we both in a musical in high school.  He was the lead and I didn't even have a speaking role.  In my defense, he was a senior and I was a measly freshman (which makes a huge difference in casting).  The love part didn't come until later after he graduated.  He asked me out on a date and I said yes...duh.  We went to get pizza and then off to the arcade (my idea).  I think he started loving me that night because of the arcade idea.  I'm a goofy chick what can I say?
     That summer went by pretty fast.  Mr. O and I had a wonderful time but he was getting ready to go off to college and I was stuck in our home town.  I was crushed the night before he left.  We talked on the phone every night and he came home as often as he could but our relationship suffered.  I often felt left behind and neglected. 
    Fast forward a few months and I was pregnant....and 16.  I told you it was about stupid teenagers.  The relationship had ended but I was forced into communication with Mr. O because of the baby.  We had broken each others' hearts.  I won't go into the details but things did not end well.  Our son was born in July of that year and we placed him for adoption.  That is a totally different post that I will go into another day.
    Mr. O and I saw each other once after that.  He brought a birthday present for Lil' Man.  The sighting lasted all of two minutes and ended with him saying "Good luck" and walking away.  It still hurt to see him leave.  But my life moved on, I graduated from high school and went on to college.  Mr. O finished college and went on to graduate school in Philadelphia.  Mr. O continued to infiltrate my mind and I missed the boy I knew when I was younger.
    The summer before my junior year of college he seemed to be ever present on my mind.  All of a sudden I got an email from him that he wanted to see him when he was home visiting from Philly.  I knew I had to see him but everyone around me including myself was anxious about the meeting.  Mr. O and I didn't get along and there were still raw scars.  The day of wasn't too bad until I was sitting there waiting for him.  I saw him walking towards me looking really good and then he bumped into a table.  Oh yeah, he was still my Mr. O.  That night ended in a kiss which I can still feel when I close my eyes.  The feelings were still there and somehow I knew things were going to change dramatically. 
    Fast forward...again...over a year this time and I'm not pregnant! Yay!  (Have to celebrate the small stuff).  Mr. O and I are still happily together.  He is my best friend and the absolute love of my life.  He finished grad school and is still in Philly working and I am sort of closer to being down with school here in Iowa.  We talk on the phone for at least an hour every night, waste time IMing each other during the day, and webcam regularly.  We see each other every three months(ish) with me flying out to Philly or him coming home.  
    Stay posted for how we keep our relationship strong, healthy, and full of love!

A is for Attitude

Today's post just hit me.
     Again, I am sitting at school and working away on my laptop, minding my own business.  All of a sudden, I hear a familiar voice from one of my classes.  This "boy" is in an educational technology class with me.  He was sitting at a table with a woman talking.  Personally, I hate eavesdropping and think it is a big no-no but he was talking so loudly I couldn't help but hear him.
    This gist of his conversation was a complaint about said technology class which consists of one day lecture and other day is in the computer lab.  I was sure that this class would be a waste of my time.  Seriously, what more could I know about technology?  I am glad to say that I was pleasantly surprised by how much I have learned already.  I'm not sure if any of you have had experience with Inspiration but it is amazing software along with delicious.  I would not have known about these wonderful tools if not for that class.
    The last thing I want to do is pass judgment on this person but how can someone be so negative?  He went on to complain about several other things from work to the amount of continuing education classes teachers have to take.  Finally, I had to get up and walk away because these comments were depressing me and I wasn't even part of the conversation. 

So, my lesson for all of you out in Lala Land today is to think of attitude like the letter 'A'.  A is first and a positive attitude should be first too.

School Life

     I thought I would begin with education because it seems like the easiest to explain.  It also seems appropriate because I am at school at the moment in the education building.  They say you should write what you know...so here is what I know. 
     I am a senior in college majoring in history education at a relatively large school in Iowa.  If you spend two minutes looking me up, you can easily figure out what school it is.  In case you don't have the time to really research it, here is a clue: it is considered the "teaching" college of Iowa.  I transferred here at the beginning of my junior year after graduating from a community college that I miss very much.  I won't graduate until December of 2010 (a semester after my goal). As for a career goal, I want to stay in Iowa.  Granted I'm still wet behind the ears but I have been around the block and know that Iowa is simply amazing.  Ideally, I will teach high school American history.  I will certified to teach US and World history, Geography, Sociology, Psychology, Economics and American Government for fifth through twelfth grade.  I know...it is a lot!  
    So there is a little background on me.  Now that I'm a senior, I have enough experience that I should have a teaching mantra by now or at least a start.  Well, back in the day (I hate that phrase) I was old school (another phrase I'm not fond of).  History wise I thought lecture was the only way to teach students.  Personally, I love taking notes and in my twisted little mind everyone else does too.  Now that I'm getting into the knitty gritty of education classes I'm learning that I want to do more.  What exactly...I'm not sure.  But I'm keeping my options open.

In the Beginning

There was a girl woman who thought, "I should start a blog." But she wasn't sure if that was a good idea fora couple of reasons.

1. Do I have the time?
2. Am I interesting enough?

She continued to think about blogging...for like two weeks which is a long time for her to contemplate something. So this girl woman person decided that a higher power (whatever that may be) was telling her to blog.

So what am I going to talk about on this blog?

• Lupus and autoimmune diseases in general
• Education
• Longdistance relationships
• My life in general
  

angelaladesigns: For Sale

Coming Soon!  Check back for new items!!!

About

It seems so very daunting to tell you the story of my life.  Do you really want to know?  Should I start in the womb?  Probably not....

First of all, I'm from rural Iowa and am surrounded by corn fields. Small towns dominate Iowa and for me, this is home.  While I love the quiet of Iowa, there isn't much to do here.  In the last year, I've become a craft-oholic.  I'm slowly learning to sew, project by project.  I'm a fan of embroidery (not your grandma's embroidery) and scrapbook paper but not really for scrapbooking.   

I fell in love with my high school sweetheart and we are currently planning our wedding which is why you will probably read a lot about my wedding.  My odd, quirky behavior extends to the wedding and with so many ideas, the wedding changes on a weekly basis.  I'm in a super close family and my madre is my best friend.  We like to go shopping together.  I am currently waiting for my niece, nephew and my future niece(or nephew) to get old enough to call me "crazy Aunt Angie".  At least I will be married and not be crazy Aunt Angie who has 12 cats and lives in the basement.

I am a lover of romance novels, the History Channel, pretending to be a hipster and movies.

If you have any questions or would like to buy one of my crafts please email me: here.